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Thursday, July 21, 2011

Romance Changes...or has it?

The other day I ran across a hand written note in my wallet that my husband gave me in 2005. Yes, I have had my wallet that long. It was written a year before we got married, while we were still dating. It was a beautifully written note with an outpouring of love and adoration my husband (then boyfriend) felt about me. Reading the letter made my heart smile. I remember those days. The days of chasing, sneaking phone calls, long hand written notes, lots of dates and fawning over each other. I thought about it for a moment how I wouldn't mind going back to those days for just a little while to appreciate our lone dates and our lack of responsibilities. I wondered if our romance has died a bit as well. Then I thought about it some more and although it has curtailed a bit, its still quite alive.

I remember my husband, my stone faced Russian man singing The Wedding Singer song that I embedded above when we were dating and how I wished all of that to be true someday. It did ring true. He has done that and more for me. I can't tell you how many times he's done the silliest of things to make me smile and how quiet he is on a lot of things but is absolutely hilarious. He has taken care of me on my sickest of days by protecting me from stress and going out during any hour of the day to get medicine for me. The man has fixed our A/C countless of times and made fires in the fireplace whenever I asked just because I was cold. He has given up his coat, socks, and even the shirt off his back when I've needed it and despite my girly request for television that he dubbed boring, he'll sit there and watch it with me. He's no stranger to the kitchen either by cooking lots of yummy meals and doing the dishes without me nagging. I'm no drinker but the times I've had a little more then one drink (which is all it takes to get me drunk) he's taken care of me.

In his letter he wrote in 2005, he promised me a life of love and family which he has given me. I don't care about being rich or having material things. It never mattered to me. I wanted a life where I was in a comfy home, had children surrounding me and a husband that truly loved me. I have it. He's given to me what he promised. We're still romantic in the teenage sense. We don't chase each other since thats a bit hard to do while we're living in the same house, but he does make sure I'm okay where ever I am. We do still sneak phone calls during the day while we're at work. We write multiple emails a day to each other about random things going on in our lives, at work and sometimes to say sorry for being grumpy that morning. We aren't all over each other 24/7 but we still take time for us. We still have awesome make out sessions like teenagers. I still smack his butt while he's walking by from time to time. I still love gazing at him until he asks ,"WHAT???". I love his smell, the way he holds my hand and the way he looks at me with those beautiful green eyes.

Romances changes a bit when you get older, have kids, and responsibilities. It doesn't mean that it dies , at least not if you let it. You have to see it differently I think. Sometimes the random installation of a light or helping you out with a project is just away of him telling you he loves you. It doesn't have to be hand written cards, jewelry and flowers. Love, mature love is more then that. Its figuring out how each others ticks and what we need in life and helping each other with that. It isn't about trying to be something we aren't or trying to fit in with hallmark definition of love. Love is just being there for one another and knowing that in life its you and him against the world.

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