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Thursday, January 22, 2009

New Life Lessons

Last week a friend of mine gave birth to another beautiful, healthy girl. This is number two for her. Her oldest child and my child are but a month apart in age. My friend (lets call her Marie) and I met each other during a girl outing right before we both became pregnant and had a wonderful bond ever since. I am blessed and feel lucky to have her and her wonderful family in my life. I just can't get over the fact that my friend has another child. It isn't that I am not happy for her. Actually I am ecstatic beyond words for her. I just am surprised with my surge of emotions about Marie's new baby.

I drove to the Birthing Inn just a day after the birth of Marie's baby to congratulate the family and see Marie's new miracle. During the twenty minute commute to The Inn, I had flashbacks of the countless drives I made to the same hospital for testing or visiting my friends newborn babies while I was still pregnant. It was so weird going there not pregnant as I remember hobbling (I was big in the third trimester) to the front door and now I could actually walk normal without fearing I would fall over or trip. As I made my way into the locked doors of the post partum wing, I had yet another flashback. I passed my old post partum room, which was empty and took a moment to remember the early days of when I first became a Mom. I remember how exciting it was, how nervous I was, and how wonderfully my husband took care of both our baby and I the first week with basically no help.

Then, after entering room #182, I met the new bundle of joy, and I did everything I could to not cry. It wasn't that I was sad because in my heart I too would like to have another baby soon and probably can not with finances (some who know me may think thats why but it isn't), but the joy in my heart was just overwhelming. Most people (I don't say all because there is ignorance in the world) before they even have children they know how precious babies/children are, but when you become a parent your view on life just changes. I saw this little girl, this beautiful sweet miracle God bestowed on my beautiful friend and just saw the beauty of life. Life really is a miracle. I could hardly remember my son being that small. Now is he this firey little toddler that talks, walks and play independently. Its just amazing how in a short span of time a baby can grow in a Mom's belly, be born and then in another short span of time grow up so fast. After a bit, it was my time to hold her. I sniffed as I tried to hold back more tears. She was so tiny, so light and so comfortable all swaddled up in her hospital blanket. Even though I held my own son 98% of the time when he was a newborn, I wish I had more time with him to just be. Now there is no way on Earth, unless I am taking him to point A to point B, that he will let me hold him for very long. It is just part of having a toddler that loves to walk. Soon enough, it was time for me to leave to be with my own family and as I headed home from the hospital I decided one thing I would do more of; I needed to "stop and smell the flowers" more often.

I entered my home with an improved thought process. I know that every age has their pros and cons. I miss holding my son when he was a newborn, but I don't miss the late night feedings and all the bottles. As my son and husband both greeted me with kisses and hugs, I took a moment to take it all in and to "stop and smell those flowers". It was wonderful. I lived in the moment as my son asked with loving eyes to be picked up and requested to sit on the couch to read a book. As I read his favorite bug book for the tenth million time, I read it as if we never read it before with more energy and excitement. There will be a day when I probably look back and wish that he would ask to sit on my lap and let me read to him. Now is the time to start living in the moment because all these beautiful daily things that happen in my life will be fleeting. I find it even more amazing that a two day old baby taught me a valuable lesson and opened up my eyes just a little bit more. It is amazing what new life can teach you. God bless you little one.

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